“Just. Leave. Me. ALONE.”
Those are the words I yelled, as I stormed down the hallway. I yelled those words to my husband after a heated debate over who even knows what. To be honest, I can’t even remember now what exactly we argued about (shows how important it was right?). I do remember heading straight for my bedroom to scream as loud as I could and finish yelling. I went into my room to think harder for more sentences, so I could run out of the room to “seal the deal.” Yes, I’m a I-need-the-last-word type of wife. At that moment I was right, (from what I thought anyway), and I needed it be known, and that was that!
The disagreement that had just happened, had me thinking about one thing, ME!
“How come my feelings don’t matter? Did he even hear what I just said? Are you kidding me right now? This can NOT be serious? Why are you not listening to me?”
With each thought playing though my head, I became even more bitter and angry. The more I thought, the more flames sparked from under my feet as I burned circles on the tile floor.
That’s it! I marched out of my room and headed back down the hallway to give my final words. However, to my surprise, he was gone. GONE. He left, just like that. This left me standing there silent, alone and mad. Quietly, I stood there and scanned the kitchen one last time just to make sure he was really not there.
I turned around and went back to the room, which now seemed so far way. When I entered my room I slammed the door as hard as I could, just in case he was near so he could hear it. I sat on the bed and just started to cry. Hands folded, shoulders slouched, and head bent over. With tears filling my eyes, I heard a tiny knock at the door.
My heart skipped a beat, and I remembered. I remembered that a room full of little people were listening next door. Watching and listening. Not even thinking clearly from our argument, I completely forgot my children were home.
Right then and there a piece of me died.
In the midst of me trying to clean my face and gather my thoughts, my door opens. My daughter enters smiling. “Mommy,” she says. “Yes, baby,” I replied as I tried to sound calm over the lump in my throat. She stood up in front me grabbed my face, leaned in and kissed me on my cheek and said, “You didn’t use your happy voice when talking to Daddy, sometimes you just have to be quiet and listen. Mommy yelling is not a good choice.” She kissed me one last time, gave me a hug, and walked out the room. Her message was delivered. Mission complete.
I couldn’t do anything after she walked out of the room but sit there. I just sat there and looked at myself in the mirror. Everything that I had been teaching my daughter about being kind, using nice words, inside voices, respecting others and treating others how you want to be treated, she taught right back to me. She taught me a lesson in about two minutes flat.
Right then and there I realized that I don’t have to respond to everything, I need to think before I speak, but most importantly God brought my daughter in to let me know that If I hold my peace He fights my battles for me. I don’t always have to have the last word.
I’m not entitled to anything.
I need to stop, slow down, and think about what’s going on, then pray. I was so consumed with what I wanted and how I wanted it, I didn’t stop to think about who was watching or the consequences of my actions. God uses anybody or anything to get your attention. In everything is a lesson, and every moment is teachable. Sometimes it’s the simple moments that have the greatest impact.
“Do you hear what these children are saying?” they asked him. ‘yes,” replied Jesus, “have you never read, “From the lips of children and infants, you Lord have called forth your praise?” Matthew 21:16
Sometimes everything we've taught our children comes right back at us a lesson we've yet to learn.Click To Tweet
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My name is Meshia Ivey, and I’m wife to Papa Bear and Mother to 3 little cubs. I’m just your typical busy woman! From finding socks to looking for monsters under covers. I enjoy writing, journaling, and painting. Anything that taps into my creative “wild” side. I take each day, one day at a time. I learned the hard way that there is no such thing as a perfect day. Be thankful for the small things and love everyday as if its your last. Follow me on Facebook and Instagram!
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